traffic tuesday #8 – attention deficit

Today’s post is dedicated to the forgetful and unobservant among us. These people bring “spice” into our lives because they overlook some of life’s most obvious occurrences.

You’ve seen these drivers. They are the ones who leave their gas caps open as they fly down the highway (usually singing while they’re at it). They leave their turn signals on for miles and have an uncanny ability to ignore the “click” of the blinker. While most humans are driven insane by the sound of the turn signal, to the attention deficit, it becomes the beat to which they drive and continue toward their destination.

Normally, this behavior is harmless. Annoying (especially in the case of the “eternal blinker”), but harmless none the less.

There are, however, times when the oblivious driver can cause you problems. For example, on my way into work today, I was almost run off the road when someone in an SUV decided to not pay attention and change lanes into my lane.

Thankfully there is a cure for the ADD driver: the horn. My own personal (and highly reliable, though completely unscientific) research has proven with all certainty that applying one’s horn to any ADD situation on the road will cure that driver of their attention problems. Of course, as with any drug, there are side affects. Beeping the horn can cause Road Rage, “You’re #1 signals” and inane screaming from the recently cured.

Apply at your own risk.
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Author: erik

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1 Comment

  1. ahhh…the horn!
    At one point in high school, I helped a buddy of mine install an air horn in his car. The kind they use on some yachts. The look on other driver’s faces when that sound came out of a Geo Metro was priceless.

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